So,
imagine that you’re a customer who, for some reason, is not happy.
You’ve had bad service or the item has fallen apart or the
shop is on fire and you’ve singed your hair or something. Doesn’t
matter. You are displeased, and that’s what’s important
here. Now, obviously you’re going to have a word, I mean your
hair’s all black, the toasters made of cake, and you’re fairly
sure the sales assistant called you a giant cock as you were leaving.
You’re not having that. You’ve encountered similar
problems before and haven’t really got anywhere, but this time you
have a game plan. This time you will not be calmed, you will
not be eased, you will not back down. This time, you shall be a
colossally unreasonable, abusive fog-horn of an arse. Because
that’s what gets results, right? Sadly, yes, it would seem so.
I
work. It’s not something I’m happy about, but I do, and although
I don’t really interact with our customers (a fairly sensible move
on the part of my employer), I do get to listen to other people
dealing with the odd disgruntled member of the public. Recently,
one such person spent a great deal of time on the phone yelling –
and I do mean yelling – at several of my colleagues. He
screamed and shouted and I expect he stomped his stupid little feet,
and in return he was treated calmly, with respect and care, and at no
point was he told to calm the fuck down you horrible skid mark of a
man. I suspect that in the end he will get what he wants, and
that doesn’t seem right to me. I’m not saying that mistakes
weren’t made, I’m not saying that he hasn’t been let down. His
hair may even be singed, though most likely because his big, fat head
produced rage-heat induced flames. It just seems that if you’re
an obnoxious, rude, unreasonable, aggressive bum crumb, and you
bellow demands as if you are the King of Fucktardtopia, you shouldn’t
have those demands met. You should be treated with the contempt
you deserve. Prick.
Thing is, mistakes get made. Nobody’s perfect, not even massive companies, and stuff goes tits up, so sometimes someone is going to be done wrong. Sometimes things are also run badly by poorly paid, disenfranchised nincompoops, which is admittedly more annoying, but still doesn’t justify acting the knob. You should of course raise the issue, you should of course voice your discontent, just try to remember that we’re all doing our best. Ok? But my advice doesn’t stop with the cuntomer. No, not a typo.
When a company compensates or otherwise reimburses somebody who
has displayed the disgusting behaviour above, they are rewarding the
act of being a nasty human being. The subconscious, mental link
made in the skull of the offender is that in order to get what they
want, they must be as loud, horrible and upsetting as is humanly
possible. Each time they get what they think they deserve, the
idea that they have to act this way is reinforced. And so the
cycle continues. I think that if someone is acting like this,
they should be calmly told that there is a three strike policy –
perhaps even a law – and that should they continue they will get
their first strike. On getting the third, they are informed
that they are no longer a customer, no longer exist to the staff and
employees, won’t be getting anything at all and that it’s all
their own thick headed fault.
One
of my work mates said that the grumpy sod on the phone was acting
like a ‘spoilt toddler’. When a child acts like that, we
know that we must stand firm and not back down, lest we create a
monster. When an adult does the same we apologise as if we’ve
acted inappropriately and give them all of the biscuits and sweets.
This is stupid and counter productive.
And
by the way, the assistant called you that as you left because that’s
what you are. Cock.
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