Well
that’s the Festive Season out of the way. Again. Another
year has fallen away like so many before it, with very little
changing, despite the deafening chorus of people otherwise convinced.
Sure, maybe you’ll go to the gym more this year, perhaps
you’ve definitely smoked your last cigarette this time, it’s
possible you might even have learnt a few things that will somehow
change the very essence of your you, but then again maybe you’ll
just carry on eating cake while you act a right prick.
You’re
very unlikely to change overnight, and that is all New Year is,
really: one night. Any sort of fundamental shift is going to
take more than a half-arsed promise at midnight, even if you’d
really rather like to be less of a you. That’s not to say
it’s not worth trying, or that it’s impossible to achieve, but
rather than dream up some terribly worthy resolution that I’ll do
for two weeks, pretend I’m still doing for a further three and then
completely forget about, I’m trying out a new mantra. An all
encompassing state of being that can fit any situation without losing
its shape, and somewhat usefully, that can be summed up in a word.
Acceptance. Which should at least make it easy to
remember.
I
hide it well, but I can get a little bit fed up with things. I
know, it seems unlikely, but there you are. It is all too
easily described as being an angry person, or a hate filled person,
as miserable, pessimistic or cynical. A stereotype is thrust
upon you that is very hard to escape from, so much so that eventually
you may start to wonder if it’s worth running anymore. It has
struck me as amusing that those who are quickest to label me
judgemental – as if that’s necessarily a negative trait – are
in fact, being very judgey themselves, but then everybody does it,
it’s a survival tool and one that serves a purpose. The
problem, I find, is not in the rashly made conclusion, but in
assuming it is correct from everyones point of view, and that, if you
deem it to be a bad thing, it should – and can – be altered, or
more specifically, fixed.
If
I decided someone was being narrow minded about something, that they
were simply wrong, in the past I would have used every last drop of
strength to make them see the error of their ways, which would
invariably end with them just as furious as I had become, and with
neither of us anywhere nearer the others end of the stick. In
most cases, the stick had been entirely forgotten about, with the joy
of self created superiority and smugness taking hold of all involved.
I
also don’t suffer fools gladly, which much to my surprise hasn’t
reduced the number of fools. If anything the number of fools is
increasing. Routine for the sake of it, particularly in the
workplace, is another personal chagrin. The desire to remove an
inefficient or redundant rule or procedure can leave me seething,
because usually, the power to achieve that removal is lacking. Some
things cannot be changed. Some people can not be reasoned with.
Sometimes, I am both. So, when something or someone that
was unlikely to change doesn’t, and you are left frustrated, angry
and quite possibly damaged, who is the fool?
So:
acceptance. Sometimes it’s better to calmly state your case
and accept it will make no difference. Sometimes, rather than
let an event colour your time negatively, just nod internally, go
‘pfff, alright then’, step away and carry on. I mean, as
you’ve stated your case, and done it so calmly, when you’re
proven right, through someones actions, mistakes made or any other
means, you still get to be all ‘I told you so’, you just have to
say it in your head, in the knowledge that vocalising that isn’t
going to help. It can only lead to a calmer, happier, more
joyful self, even if on the outside everyone still just sees the same
sour faced pedant. Hopefully it will be recognised, though I
suspect not.
Much
like when the blue of salt and vinegar was swapped with the green of
cheese and onion, there will always be people who don’t understand
that it’s the same coloured bag with different flavoured crisps
inside. It’s really not that complicated. Idiots.
Which I accept, obviously.
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